Tuesday, 24 November 2009

Work, gym, and the spanish

I've been quite busy these last days, wich is good, days go by very quickly, and I have no time to get bored. There is nothing to do there other than work or drink anyway... it is foggy 20 days a month, and the other days are grey and rainy, I really hate november.

As I told you, I found another job beside the work at the physical therapist. I work at the universitary hospital for a team of guys doing a research on intestinal diseases. Hum... now I know all about anal abcesses, bloody stool, and intestinal fistulas. How glamorous... But otherwise it's cool because there is no fix schedule, I can go there when I want and work for how much I want, it is very flexible. And my boss is a really cool young black girl, full of life, wich makes the work look much more funny than it actually is.

On an other topic, I finally got to see Alessandro naked (well, appart from his boxer), and wow... I thought that guys like that only existed on photoshoped pictures for underwear advertisement :P Oh my god, everything is perfect... the only thing is that he's totally shaved on the belly, and I find it sexier with a happy trail, but I could take him like that all the same :) He's my motivation to go to the gym three times a week. It had been a while since I last went, and I must say that I missed it very much, all these hot guys showing off... I love it. And now that there is Alessandro...

I also met a new guy, Guilermo. He's spanish. I'm supposed to be his "tutor" for this year. I took three "younger" students under my wings, in oder to help them to get acquainted with the academic world. All of them are begining there studies, but only one is younger in age. Guilermo is the same age as me. We met a few times, and we immediatly had a very good contact, we immediatly felt comfortable with each other. We are there to talk about the studies, but we always discuss other things, and have a good conversation. He's good looking, and has beautiful grey-brown eyes. I think that he's gay, I saw him talking with some other gay guys and kiss them on the cheek. So well, maybe we'll be a bit more than formal study mates, whatever will it be...

Tuesday, 10 November 2009

20 years ago

It was twenty years ago, and it is my first visual memory. I was three years old, we were looking at the tv, and I saw the Berliner wall fall on this day of November. I think that I didn't realise at that moment what it was, but I realised that it was really important, seing how happy all these people were crossing the boarder, and with how much anger they were destroying this shameful separation. It seems so incredible right now to think that when I was born, Europe was still cut in two parts...

Appart from that, I'm back from one month stuck in the library. We attented a law competition with three friends of mine, and me and Alessandro put all our heart and mind at work during the last month. We were a bit disapointed because the two other guys were not really in the same state of mind, and therefore the paper we gave back to the jury is far to be good enough to be among the twelwe best to go for the final... But we cross our fingers, and hope that there were even worse competitors than us!

I planned some travels for the winter. There are not many things that I hate more that this season, and I try to get as busy as I can, and I think that I can't get more busy than that. I'm working twice longer on the days to get some extra cash, and as soon as I can after Christmas, I will go to Italy with some friends. When I'll be back, I'll take a trip to Istanbul with crazy girl (I know I know...) and look forward to see this impressive city! It's been a dream of mine since we talked about it at school when studying the history of the roman empire. After that I'll have just a few days before my exams, and then will attend extra lessons on european laws. In between, I'll try to go up and visit some family in the Alps. I'm looking forward!

I hope that everyone else is allright :) I had no time to read other blogs...

See you guys!

Saturday, 10 October 2009

Sans le jazz...

... la vie serait une erreur, said Boris Vian, and I couldn't agree with him more!

The jazz club where I'm used to spend the weekends reopened last week after the summer break. I went with some friends to listen to a concert, and it was awesome. They had never heard jazz before! what a shame! They enjoyed it, ant I hope that some of them are gonna come with me next time.

I'm going again tonight with Sarah, and a collegue from work. It turned out that he's a jazz fan too, and a collects old jazz vinyls. I guess his house is full of them, and that there is always a piece of Duke Ellington, Dave Brubeck or whoever else on the record deck.

Just for the plesure of the ears, a masterpiece of my favourite pianist, Erroll Garner:

Wednesday, 30 September 2009

Gay rights in Switzerland, and a specific matter

I had a very intersting day today. It was my fist session of legal assistance. There is a legal council in our university with master students, and we treat some cases submited by anyone from the university or from outside. The aim is to give a first legal opinion on any matter submited to us. It's very useful both for us and the people, for us because it provide us some real cases to treat, and for them because they can get some advice for free.

The first case today was very complicated, but so interesting! I can't say the details because we are subjected to confidentiality, but it was about gay rights in Switerland. I will just write some important points about the state of gay unions in Switzerland, wich could be interesting for some of you.

Switzerland has adopted a law allowing same sex unions with basically the same rights as marriage. Gay couples are treated almost equally compared to married people. The big remaining difference is that the gay couples are denied the right to adopt children. The gay unions are officially called "registered partnership" (how poetic...). Basically, this goes in the right direction, as the gays and lesbians have now the right to commit in a civil partnership according most of the rights accorded to married people.

There has been a lot of political efforts to bring birth to this law. Some states in Switzerland (wich is, as the USA, a federal country, with 26 states) are catholic, and very conservative politically speaking, and some others are very "open" and liberal, mostly the states where the biggest cities are located. All the laws voted by the parliement can be submitted to the people for a referendum, and can therefore be refused. The problem for the parliement was to edict a law that could be accepted by the people, and a compromise had to be made between the different political sensibilities. Allowing marriage to gay couple was out of option. Doing so seemed impossible, as the people, in the case of a referendum, would for sure have refused it, because it was going to far. But the necessity to allow rights to homosexual couples was obvious. This compromise was finally found, and submitted to the swiss people, wich accepted it with a "yes" rate of about 58% (if I remember well).

It is a good thing I think, because we avoided the debate about marriage, with all the traps linked to it, the conflicts with the traditionnal and religious conceptions.

The law is good, but there are a few bad points. Appart from the problem of child adoption, a big problem comes from the designation of the official civil status. Married people are "married" on the official papers, while, logically, gay couples are listed as "linked by a registered partnership".

Here lies one of the problem that we treated tonight: when you want to be hired, and go to a job interview, the future employer has the right to ask questions about your civil status, as it can be important for him because he may have to know it (in order to establish the official documents for the social insurrances for instance). Therefore, you have basically no choice but to make your coming out to your employer if you are linked by a registered partnership, whereas you wouldn't have to do it if you weren't officialy together, because the sexual orientation is considered to be part of the very private life. This is, according to me, beyond reasonnable, it is a discrimination against gay people. It can lead to a disadvantage, knowing that homosexuality is far to be accepted by everyone.

Any discrimination based on the sexual orientation is forbidden by our constitution, and it would be easy to point it out in front of a constitutionnal court, but the problem is that, in Switzerland, believe it or not, there is no constitutionnal court! The respect of the constitution is verified by the parliament when he does the laws. The constitutionnality of the federal laws cannot be examined by any court!

In our case, it means that the discrimination generated by this law (wich otherwise is a very good inovation), although not compatible with our constitution, cannot be eliminated by any other way than a political action, and a modification of the different laws involved, and there is no political intention of doing so.

So, tonight, we, little students, decided to search for a legal way to make that change. I'm full of enthusiasm for this first case (especially because I could also be concerned in a few years), but I know that the chances are not far from zero. There are however other important questions in this case, wich could be easier to answer.

Friday, 25 September 2009

Master

Hi guys!

I started the lessons last week, and discovered my new professors, courses, and mates. As I'm staying at the same university, I already know most of them, but I made a few new acquaintances. Alessandro still sits next to me as last year, and it's great to be with him at the lessons.

It's very interesting, because we are mixed with some people who are doing a master degree in penal prosecution, wich mixes law courses and forensic sciences, and we have very interesting discussions. I thought about doing this master myself, as I'm very interested in penal issues, but gave up the idea when Maria told me about some awful experiences she had had on crime scenes... The idea of being present during autopsies of heavily injured or rotten bodies discouraged me. But although I don't plan to be a prosecutor, I still keep the idea of being a penal lawyer.

I have no more news from Lucas, but after a few days, I don't care that much anymore. I was really down during two days, but then, I realised that I was sad to have lost an opportunity, and not really what I had. I mean, I was thinking about how it could be great to be with each other, but without knowing anything of him. It felt good to be with him, but as it would with any other cute guy. After all, I have no real experience of a relationship. And there has been so many "void" years before I accepted my homosexuality, that as soon as I have someone kissing me I think that I'm in love. I've been in love, but I've never lived it with someone who loves me in return, and maybe that's why I feel so urged to be in a relationship. But it doesn't happen like that. I slept with two guys, and it was wonderful to discover all these new feelings, but I don't know if we would have had anything to share, other than sex. I'd like to meet someone with whom I can share something. To start with the sex doesn't really seem to be the best solution... After that I felt bond, I felt as if something was necessarily going to come out of this, but it didn't. Well, I think that I have learnt that there is a difference between sex and love. I discovered the first with an immense satisfaction, and some bitter desappointements, and I hope now to find the second with a bit of luck.

I had a call from Stan on skype, and I was so happy to speak with him! He told be about his trip in Rio di Janeiro, and about his new stard in the UK. I'm maybe going to pay him a visit this winter. I had planned to do so in spring, but he said he didn't want to wait that long, and neither do I :) We talked about some very personnal stuff, and I'm so happy to have someone like him to talk with.

This autumn and winter will be busy. I decided to subscribe to a national oratorical competion for the law students with Alessandro, and it will need a lot of work. The first selection is in early November, and, if we are among the best, the final would be held in front of a federal court in februrary. It is a really big challenge, and I hope that we will be good enough to pass the first selection. In between, I'll go to visit Istanbul just after the new year, and before my exams. If I find a free slot, I'll pay a visit to Stan.

On another topic, I had my last three wisdom teeth removed yesterday. This time I went to a real surgeon in a private clinic. I saw the difference with the other one! It went quick and easy, with explanation and medication. But the price is... hum... astonishing... :/ Well, it's an investment, I learnt last time that when it's about health, you better have to put the price! It's good that I have some money here or there.

See you!

Charlie

Thursday, 17 September 2009

What can you say when a love affair is over?

I got a mail from Lucas, and it's not great news... It wasn't really a surprise after last Friday. Well, he says he has a lot on his mind, he hadn't moved on from his last boyfriend, does not want any commitment now with all the work he has at the univerity, and blamed alcool for what happened between us. So, it's over... I felt really bad yesterday, when I received it, I felt sad and angry. Sad because even if I didn't know what would happen between us, I was feeling good with him. Angry because I don't understand how it can go from "you're the nicest guy ever, I feel so good when I'm with you, I want to see you again" to that in just a few days. Maybe I gave the impression to want too much too fast, but when a guy says such things, how would you react? Play like you're not interested? I don't know... I don't know what and if I did something wrong. I wish I could learn something from that but I dont know what. Maybe to be less enthusiastic, more careful. I'm sad that he didn't decide to give a try, without thinking too much about what would happen.

It'll take me a few days to recover I guess...

Sunday, 13 September 2009

Smoke on the water

This was a horrible day. It's one of these days when I'm horribly angry and just want to scream and destroy something. This all started yesterday I guess. I had planed to go have a walk with Lucas. I wanted to a place called Caux, over Montreux, and wher there is an astonishing view on the lake and the Alps. I thought that it would be a nice wather, and that we could have a walk, lie down somewhere in the grass under a blue sky, and have a nice time. This is how it looks by nice weather:



Wonderful isn't it? It was supposed to be, but instead, arriving on top, we found ourselves stuck in the fog, and it looked quite depressing. Moreover, everything was wet, and instead of the great romantic promenade I had planned, it was more like a fight to make a step in the mud without slipping. Great... So, no lying down in the grass. After a long walk in the forest, wich, with the fog, looked totally like one of a horror movie, I finally found a more a less dry bench, with the view on... nothing. Well, I asked if he wanted to sit for a moment (I didn't really need to sit, I just wanted to have a quiet place to kiss and talk, and was hoping he would understand) and he said "Are you tired? I don't really want to sit here, there is nothing to see" I insisted that we would sit, and we started to talk. He was looking at some ants on the ground, and I was wondering how he could think of anything else than looking at me and kiss me. He was going on speaking, and I came closer, put my arm around his shoulder, and he was still looking at the ants and speaking. I started to rub is back, very smoothly, and then caress his neck hair. Nothing more. I started to kiss him on the neck, and expected him to turn his head and kiss me. No reaction. I got so confused... how could he be so unreactive after the weekend we had had? He just put his head on my shoulder for a minute, and then four peoples on bikes arrived out of nowhere, and he woke up and proposed to go to look at the village down the path. I was so frustrated and confused...

We went down to the village, this event really killed my enthusiasm. We spoke of insignificant things like how nice was this chalet or that, and I really felt bad, a mix of disappointement, frustration, and other mixed feelings. We took the train down to Montreux, and when we arrived at the station, I asked if we could meet again at my place this week, and he said "yeah, we'll see, I have a lot to do this week you know" and this totally killed me. I went home, so confused, and didn't know what to do. I didn't do anything, and this morning just wrote a nice text, and got no answer. So, this drove me mad the whole day. I was also going to see Stan, who came back from Brazil, and is going for one year in the UK, so this was my last chance to see him before long, and he called to say he had no time. You can imagine in what state I began my evening... Luckily, a good friend called, and we went to have a drink in a bar, and now I feel a little bit better, but I'm still wondering what happened with Lucas, and hope that it is only a misunderstanding or something... :/

When I can't control my feelings, it really drives me totally mad...